I heard this phrase at church last weekend and it’s been stuck in my head & heart ever since. We are going through a series about finding your purpose right now, and to be quite honest it’s something that I have always struggled with. Comparison is such a thief. I’m always trying to remind myself that God knows exactly what he’s doing and even though I may not know yet to just trust in Him…but it’s SO hard sometimes. Let’s take it back three years.
I was newly married, had a great job as a Supervisor and decided to ditch it for an airline job. Not like a cool airport job, I was the girl outside tossing (mostly throwing) your luggage, marshaling airplanes into their gate and even dumping human waste at the end of the day out of the lav. Most days I went home and cried to Alex because I was miserable and tired. To complicate things even more I found out I was pregnant, and four weeks later went through the heartache of a miscarriage. Talk about confused and straight up angry.
This was most likely one of the most confused times in my life, but I made it through, and I wouldn’t change a thing. I learned a lot about myself and how to create my own sunshine even on the worst days. I think it’s safe to say I’m even confused these days when it feels like everything is falling into place on what my true purpose is. After landing a career in something I didn’t even study in college I constantly question if this is where God needs me to be. I’m fairly certain the answer is yes, but again I’m just trying to figure it out like everyone else. I become so envious of people who know what their gifts are and how to share them with the world. I was hiking with a friend a few weeks ago through Rocky Mountain National Park and we were chatting about this, and I made a comment that people are so sure of their heavenly gifts and I’m out here like GIVE ME A SIGN, but that’s greedy and you shouldn’t ask for that right? Then just as I look up there’s a gang of Elk just a few feet from us (I never see wildlife on hikes for some reason) and I could just feel that little voice in my head laugh and tell me to settle down, because even if I’m not sure He most certainly is.
Even in the blogging world I found myself confused for a little bit on what kind of blogger I wanted to be-a fashion blogger? Lifestyle? Travel? Katelyn just pick one. I’m none of these things, I’m my own kind of blogger sharing my outfits, life lessons, my heart, and that’s the beauty of this. I can be exactly who I want to be as a blogger and I don’t need thousands of followers to feel heard and loved (mostly because I know my mom is always going to read these-HI MOM).
What I’m trying to say through all of this is if you feel SO confused on what your true purpose is in this world-you’re not alone-but’s it’s going to be okay. It’s okay to be confidently confused because if we all knew exactly what our life was meant to be, we’d be living in quite the different world. Just try to learn and appreciate where you are.
Thank you for listening! Happy Monday!